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[lightthedarkness]

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Usagi Tsukino ⬤ Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon
Residential District ⬤ Level 2
Moonblessing ⬤ Iris

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[lightthedarkness]

Oh... that sounds... so sad, because I'm a stronger person and able to do so much because of how strongly I feel my emotions, because of all the people I love and who love me. I don't think I could ever bring myself to not feel something, feeling emotion, it may mean sometimes giving in to anger, but it means giving in to love and hope too.

[She tilted her head as she looks to Kerra.] If the Force isn't good or evil, why would feeling something make you turn to the Dark Side, if you have to live your life not feeling anything, not making any connections... well, I guess that makes you better than me, Kerra-san, I could never live a life like that, and would never want to.

Who is forcing you into anything fast?

[erranthero]

Erosion of restraint leads to more reliance on emotion, which taps into the baser instincts of the psyche. Being angry means I'm more likely to do things on instinct, with the Dark Side. It's...easy...to slip into that, when you've brushed it once. Imagine knowing that you have a way to solve all your problems, to take care of the things causing problems for everyone you care about. That's what the Dark Side is like. A well of power always there, whispering.

We aren't forbidden from experiencing emotion, though. I think...maybe I'm not explaining this too well. It's more not keeping hold of ourselves. Allowing ourselves to slip, even a little.

Which is exactly what the Moons here do. The influence of them changes how I feel, makes it more and more difficult to keep my control and makes me more aggressive. That's...skirting close to the Dark Side, in some ways. Nobody here is forcing me into anything, but the moons are making it difficult to find the balance I should have.

[lightthedarkness]

Um... Kerra-san, I know you said you aren't forbidden from it... But it sounds like, you either don't experience any emotions or every little bit of it could cause you to slip to this Dark Side.

It... kinda sounds like you're afraid of losing control, and fear is an emotion, but it seems to be the only emotion you have. If you at least... I guess if you at least focused on something else maybe you wouldn't be afraid anymore?

[erranthero]

Moderation, Usagi. All things in moderation.

[She shakes her head, letting out a reedy sigh.]

I'm not shaking in my boots, and I do feel other emotions. I am glad to have someone to listen, and that's an emotion. But I'm concerned that the moons are going to become a problem. I intensely dislike feeling like if I don't find someone to fuck like four times a day then I'm going to start acting out for several days out of the month.

You know how hard it is to focus during the moon cycles, I assume? Have you not done things you wouldn't ordinarily do to stop the pressure?

[lightthedarkness]

[Perhaps it was because they had ONLY just met, and this was their first interaction so Usagi's sampling size of Kerra's emotional state was small, but it felt like she was feeling way more than she should be according to this thing.]

So then, you could have lust in moderation, right? And anger? I mean, trust me I know... [She blushed deeply at Kerra's question, looking away with a small nod.] I-I get it, but I-I find that it's... well, for me, it lessens when...

It's more intense, the more I try to ignore it. [She manages to get out.] Maybe... it could be the same for you?

[erranthero]

Maybe. And I apologize.

[Kerra shakes her head, not looking directly at Usagi. She knew what she'd said was probably not a comfortable thing to hear. She should not have asked that last question, and she knows it.]

'course, that would involve me having a clue how to go about that stuff beyond hookups. I haven't...as you can imagine...exactly had much opportunity for anything more than quick get-togethers, at home. I haven't really had much of a life at all outside of fighting for the last couple of years, even for that. It's a real shitshow.

[lightthedarkness]

Beyond hookups? So you want a relationship? [She just wanted to be sure?] Well, it's... not too different from this, really. You go get food together, you have open conversations about feelings and hopes and dreams, and even silly things about how you feel and what you like to do.

You do things together like see movies or concerts or parks, you just try to be there for someone as much as you can and be the support they need and they support you in return.

It's like friendships but with extra attached, sometimes you can only tell them something that you'd never tell anyone else.

Um, does any of that help?

[erranthero]

I want to try, while I can, I guess.

[That's just it. she doesn't completely know what it is she wants.

But she does want something. Even if it's temporary.]

And yes, it does. It's very basic, but it helps to be reminded what people do outside of the Order.

[lightthedarkness]

Pretty sure who's ever in charge of picking Jedi would take one look at me and go 'nope' so you can definitely trust me to be outside of the Order. [She joked.]

But I'm glad I could be some help, Kerra-san, and you can always come to me for that sorta thing!

[erranthero]

Most likely. You're too old to train, and you don't...well, I can sense that you don't have the potential anyway. I think it's unique to home.

[Which, is definitely true.]

Regardless, thank you.

[lightthedarkness]

So, what does it take to have the potential to be a Jedi? What is a Jedi trained to do?

And I'm happy to help! Everyone needs someone they can talk it out with sometimes.

[erranthero]

To sense and manipulate the Force. But it's something you have to be born with the ability to feel. It's not common at all.

[lightthedarkness]

That's okay, sounds cool though. What can you make it do? the Force I mean?

[erranthero]

Oh. A number of things. Mostly extra senses, but I can make myself stronger and faster, or move things with my mind.

[To demonstrate, she reaches out and plucks an apple from a nearby tree, floating it on over to Usagi.]

See?

[lightthedarkness]

[Her eyes widen and she lets the apple just hang in mid-air for a moment. She waves a hand back and forth above and below it but nope, no wires or nothing or little robots holding it in place.]

THAT'S SO COOL! Can you do it with bigger things? Like buildings or cars or people or even whole planets!

[erranthero]

Whole...planets? No, that's pretty impossible. And it'd be devastating for the planet even if I could.

[Even a few inches could cause massive gravitational shifts.]

...But cars and people? Sure. Prefab buildings I could probably do, but they'd fall apart too.

[lightthedarkness]

Does it hurt to be lifted by the Force?

[Even without Force-sight, Kerra can probably see where this might lead.]

[erranthero]

I don't know.

[Kerra holds up one hand, and Usagi will feel an invisible hand closing around her waist, lifting her up.]

Does it?

[It shouldn't. Just feel like something solid has closed around her.]

[lightthedarkness]

[Usagi is suddenly lifted in the air and reached out as if to steady herself but there was nothing to really do anything about being lifted.]

This is so cool! Oh my gosh! Thank you! I've never been like, Force lifted before!

[erranthero]

Yeah? I can't imagine it's the most common thing.

[So she's just going to swing Usagi back and forth, side to side, a little more playfully than anything.]

[lightthedarkness]

This is so cool! Do Jedi do this kinda stuff to each other all the time? Or is having fun not allowed? [She's teasing, but she's also not.]

[erranthero]

Fun is allowed, though being flippant with the essence of life is discouraged...

[Yeah. This is not something she's supposed to be doing.]

[lightthedarkness]

This isn't being flippant. [Whatever that meant.] This is having fun. And you just said fun is allowed. Besides, think of it like... experimentation! How are you going to know what the Force can do if you don't try to do everything!

[erranthero]

I mean, I know I can do it.

[Up, up, and she spins Usagi upside down and back like a gyroscope.]

It's more that it's not good to play with a tool, you know.

[lightthedarkness]

[Kjnwekq She puts her hands out to steady herself.]

Is it a tool when it's life? Life is supposed to be all sorts of things. How can you know calm and collected if you don't know playful and super wild, right? There see, you should totally be doing this.